Enchantment Passing Through

Feelingsfeelingsfeelings

I hate the way my mind works. I could almost swear that I have Asberger’s Syndrome when it comes to relationships. I just can’t handle relationships. I mean, dear God I’m only 17. I don’t want someone to be attached to me, especially someone who lives here. He’s great, but I can’t. I’m going to college; I’m going away. I am not staying here. I can’t let this kid fall for me; not when I could never reciprocate his affections. Not when my one and only goal is to get away from here. The worst part is, I am the worst kind of person. I am a total bitch because I knew I had no intention of anything serious, and I didn’t tell him before this started. Now he’s in deep, and I’m entirely blasé about our relationship. I feel smothered, and it’s my own fault. I’m way too independent, and I just can’t. And.. Balls.